pardon me while i stomp my feet

sometimes I want to stomp me feet like a brat child. Hell I just want things to go the way I want them…. sometimes.

I know that life happens as it should. but damn it. I wanted my grandkids here, just once. I wanted my love to not work so hard that he ended up sick in bed. I wanted grandma to be well and not have to risk chemo. I wanted my 4 wheeler returned to me clean and not covered in mud. I want my family happy and healthy and with me. Just once.

Was it really to much to ask?  I never ask for things for myself. But sometimes on rare occasions I dare to try and be selfish. Now I want to cry but whats the point. I want my arm to stop stinging from my new tattoo. I want my friend to have some time to play. I want to stop being so angry at my ex for his selfish behavior. And I want to stop being mad at myself for wasting so much of my life on the idiot.

I want to take my darling and run away for a few days. I want him to not have to go back to his second job. But he will, and at least it is only for another week.

I want my shoulders to stop hurting. I want to not feel short tempered with my clients. I want to see a new job in my future so I don’t feel so stressed out. Wow I want to stop wanting because I sound like my grandson who is 4.



Well that was me stomping my feet. I have had my scartlet o hara moment and now I will take a deep breath and put on my big girl panties and go cook some dinner because darn it I am hungry. and not just for food. But one step at a time.



  1. airasetsunyo said,

    January 4, 2014 at 2:53 pm

    Lol oh my. You go on with it girl sometimes a good pity party is just what is needed. Hugs

    • loneyheart said,

      January 5, 2014 at 2:35 am

      my kid just broke my heart. everyone was to sick to come spend some kind of Christmas with me but they were all well enough to go to the nieces birthday party. to open my gifts with their other grandma.
      Its just not fair.

      • airasetsunyo said,

        January 5, 2014 at 2:44 pm

        Families are difficult waters to tred. You would never let some of the behaviors they exhibit in your life if it was a friend behaving that way … but family is family and blood is thicker than water and it’s just difficult to know the right thing to do with them to balance your life sometimes. I mean how do you write off your family?
        yours in life and leather
        slave of DarkHouse

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